Buffet

Today, I had a scheduled therapy appointment because I was supposed to get my teeth pulled on Monday and knew I'd be stressed. Even though I had planned not to have therapy during my birthday month of May, I was glad I went. I've been feeling very anxious and had been working on letters to people I needed to express my feelings to, even though they’re no longer in my life. Leah suggested writing these letters to get my feelings out on paper, whether I send them or not. Since I hadn’t been to therapy in weeks, there was a lot of catching up before I read my letter to my dad. Leah thought it was a bit over the top and blamed him for a lot, but he’s not a nice man, and my unresolved feelings about my family leave me with no closure and worried about the future.

Later, I took Colton to a buffet restaurant, thinking he would try a variety of foods. Instead, he just had two slices of pizza and a ton of ice cream with root beer poured over it, just like my sister said would happen. It was fun hanging out with him, even though his worried mind kept thinking he would get food poisoning and that the place was "sketchy." It wasn’t; maybe the outside in El Cajon looked rough, but inside it was fine. Most of the time, I had to steer the conversation away from his worries. He didn’t want me to leave him and go back to the buffet without him, which made me realize he’s way too nervous for a 10-year-old. Clearly, it wasn’t really worth the $25 for his meal, but I’m glad my sister paid.

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